Dear Me: Your Light Never Takes the Same Shape Twice

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Gina Susanna, NEDA Ambassador

Thank you to Eating Recovery Center for sponsoring this blog post in conjunction with Eating Recovery Day on May 7, 2019. 

Dear Me– 

I know, it’s been a while since we’ve talked. I mean, really talked. Not just “What do you want to watch on Netflix?” talk, feelings talk. 

Checking in with yourself” talk.

Remembering your worth” talk. 

That part’s the hard part, isn’t it? It doesn’t always come naturally. You’re so used to being hard on yourself, pushing yourself to do better, that sometimes you forget we all need a little check-in every once in a while.

A “Hey, babe, you’re doing okay” moment.

Or a “It’s okay to just be” moment.

Or a “You really did that” moment.

To be proud. To be humbled. To honor yourself in whatever moment you’re in, right now.

So, let’s do that:

You survived. You dragged yourself out of the pit of mental illness, where your eating disorder tried to swallow you whole, wrap itself around your heart and squeeze the life out of you, but you broke free.

You survived the ghosts of depression, the “I’m not good enough’s” and the “I’ll never get there’s,” and you replaced them with love and support and “Why not try’s?”.

You’ve blossomed, and grown, and failed, and persevered.

You’ve become, and are still becoming.

Dear Me, we don’t talk as often as we should. But since we’re talking now, I want you to hear me when I say:

I love you. For where you’ve come from, and where you’re going.

For who you were before, who you are today, and who you are yet to be.

You will never be just this one thing–like a flame, your light never takes the same shape twice. It’s always dancing—softly, gently, mesmerizing in every form.

Your life, your recovery, your journey is far from over.

I can’t wait to see all the shapes your light takes.



Gina is a writer, blogger, and Instagrammer whose work integrates mental health and eating disorders on the axes of body politics and self acceptance. Currently she runs the Instagram account @nourishandeat, providing inspirational and thought-challenging content, along with sharing her own personal journey. She is the creator of the hashtag #embracethesquish, a movement driven by the idea that our bodies in every form are worthy of love and respect. She believes in the power of authenticity and acceptance, working to make sure her followers know that perfection — in life and in recovery — doesn’t exist. Gina is a frequent speaker at various workshops, panels, retreats, and NEDA walks. She is also currently enrolled in graduate study to receive her Masters in Clinical Mental Health. You can find Gina on Instagram, Twitter, or somewhere under a blanket. With snacks.